Deep Thinking. . .

At the end of 2019, I finished reading the Bible through for the 10^th or 11^th time.  I’ve forgotten exactly how many times, but that’s not important.  Every time I read through the Bible, I find myself in renewed awe of God’s Word.  Every time through, I find something new; well, it’s not new, because it’s in there, it’s new to me because it is revealed to me in a different way. 

This time, I learned something that has really made me think.  I mean deep thinking, like the statue of the thinker, deep.  The New Testament tell us that Jesus, while walking on earth, marvelled over two things.  Let’s look at them:

The first is found in Matthew 8:10 “When Jesus heard [it], he marvelled, and said to them that followed, Verily I say unto you, I have not found so great faith, no, not in Israel.” Jesus marvelled at this faith.  This faith was the faith of the centurion that came to Jesus on behalf of his servant that was sick.  The centurion, a Roman, knew that Jesus was the only hope for his servant.  He besought Jesus to just say the word and the servant would be healed.  Jesus said to the centurion that He would go to the man’s house.  The centurion said no, I’m not worthy, just say the word and my servant will be healed.  Jesus marvelled at this man’s faith.  Jesus told the crowd that He had not seen such great faith in all of Israel. 

The second time is found in Mark 6:6 “And he marvelled because of their unbelief. And he went round about the villages, teaching.”  Jesus went to His own country and began to teach in the synagogue.  The people said isn’t this Jesus, Mary’s boy?  The scripture says they were astonished.  Jesus marvelled at their unbelief—their lack of faith. Because of their lack of faith, Jesus did not do many mighty works.  

This amazes me.  Jesus marvels over one thing—our faith.  The Lord Jesus, the Author and Finisher of our faith, marvels over our faith.  He told the disciples that if they had faith the size of a grain of a mustard seed, they could move mountains. 

The Bible also tells us in Romans 12:3 “For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think [of himself] more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.”  God has given to us the measure of faith that we need. 

Let’s pull this together:  while walking on this earth, Jesus marvelled over a great faith and a lack of faith.  Jesus told the disciples that all we need is faith the size of a grain of a mustard seed and we could move mountains.  God has provided us the measure of faith.  Jesus is marveling over your faith; is it because it is great or because it is lacking?  Perhaps the Lord isn't working in your life because your lack of faith is hindering His working.    Is the Lord marvelling over your lack of faith?  

Looking Back

On New Year’s Day, I preached a sermon out of the Book of James.  Here was my text:

James 1:19-27

19 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:

20 For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.

21 Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls.

22 But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.

23 For if any be a hearer of the word, and not a doer, he is like unto a man beholding his natural face in a glass:

24 For he beholdeth himself, and goeth his way, and straightway forgetteth what manner of man he was.

25 But whoso looketh into the perfect law of liberty, and continueth therein, he being not a forgetful hearer, but a doer of the work, this man shall be blessed in his deed.

26 If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man's religion is vain.

27 Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.

The text is a challenge to look at ourselves.  I would like each of us to look back at this last year, 2019, and see what manner of man (or woman) we were.  This passage gives the picture of the Bible as a mirror in which we can see our own reflection.  Notice the illustration goes on to say that we can look at ourselves in the mirror and then walk away forgetting what kind of person we are.  I asked the folks these questions about their lives in 2019.

1.            Are you the Christian You Ought to Be?

Have you lived the Christian life that you should have? I’m sure there were spiritual highlights and spiritual low lights in your year, there sure were in mine.  Look back with me for a few moments and think of the highlight reel of your 2019.  There may have been some true spiritual victories.  Sin that you overcame.  Discouragement that you set aside.  There may have been some true spiritual missteps as well.  I think of these as our blooper reels.  You know, when the receiver fumbles the pass or when the shortstop misses the easy catch.  Things that leave you smacking yourself upside the head.  The real question is what did you spend 2019 seeking?  Matthew 6:33 “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Have you put the kingdom of God first? Or have you put yourself first?

2.            Are you the Friend You Ought to Be?

Humans have a need for social interaction.  Some of us like to be alone, but there comes a time we seek out friends.  Remember the Tom Hanks movie “Cast Away?”  He got to a point where he needed companionship, so he made a friend out of a volleyball.  We need friends.

Are we the kind of friend that we should be?

Proverbs 18:24 “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” Have we been a true friend?  Have we been willing to help those in need? Were we the kind of friend that we would want to have? 

3.            Are you the Spouse You Ought to Be?

How was your married life in 2019?  Were you the husband or wife you ought to have been in 2019? The Bible gives us clear direction on what kind of wife and husband we ought to be.

Ephesians 5:22-25 tells us:

22 “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;”

Ladies, have you submitted like you ought to have? Jesus submitted to God.  If we are Christians, we ought to be Christ-like.  Luke 22:42 Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.  The Lord Jesus submitted to the Father. 

Brothers, have you loved like you ought to have? In that passage of scripture, men are told to love their wives three times.  It’s 3 times as important for men to love their wives as it is for wives to submit to their husband.  If we love our wife like Jesus loves the church, our wife will have no problem submitting to us.  How did Jesus love?  Jesus loved selflessly, sacrificially, and steadfastly

               

4.            Are you the Child You Ought to Be?

Young people, have you been the child you ought to be?  Have you listened, obeyed, and honored your parents?  Adults, have you been the child to your parents you ought to be?  You’ll always be a child, no matter how old you get.  We find directions on how to be the child we ought to be in the Bible.

Ephesians 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)

Are you the man, woman, boy, or girl that you thought you were? Are you the spouse or friend you thought you were?  Do you need to make some improvements in your life? You can start today!  We’ve looked in the mirror that is the Word of God.  Are you going to make changes or walk away forgetting what manner of man you are?  

'Tis the Season

Looking at my wife’s calendar is exhausting.  Looking at my calendar is as well.  I’m reminded of my Grandmother saying this one time: “we’re trying to put 10 pounds of sugar in a 5-pound sack.”  Christmas means many things to many people, but I think we can all agree on this one thing.  From Thanksgiving to New Year’s, we are super busy. 

Work parties.  School parties.  Getting together with family and friends.  Church activities.  School programs.  Who has time for everything that comes at us?  Everyone wants to share some time with us during the holidays, which is great.  I love getting together with family and friends and spending time with the church family during the holidays. 

But wait, there’s more!  Decorating, shopping, wrapping, cleaning, and cooking!  And of course, there’s the dreaded waking up in the middle of night, with the realization that we forgot to get a gift for Great-Aunt Edna!  What are we going to get her?  She has everything imaginable! 

I’m not surprised that Santa made a list and checked it twice, I’m surprised he only checked it twice!  

We get so busy that we often forget the purpose of the holiday. 

What is the purpose of Christmas?  It’s not the gifts, nor is it the decorations, nor is it even all the get togethers.  The purpose of Christmas is to take some time to reflect on what happened in Bethlehem all those years ago.  When a young woman gave birth to the Son of God.  If that isn’t amazing enough, that same babe would grow up into a man Who would willingly give His life in exchange for people who didn’t even know Him at the time (Romans 5:8). 

As Christmas approaches, let’s purpose to slow down our hectic pace and spend time quietly reflecting on the purpose of the season.  Stop pursuing the perfect gift for Great-Aunt Edna and instead, pursue a closer relationship with Jesus. 

The Bible tells us about some wise men who visited Jesus in Bethlehem.  The wise men must have taken a wrong turn in the desert because they didn’t get to see Jesus until He was about two years old.  For two years, they followed the star that was guiding them.  They didn’t give up.  They didn’t give out.  They didn’t give in.  They pursued.  Over hill and mountain, moor and fountain, they pursued the star, not because it was an astronomical anomaly, but because of what it represented—the birth of the King of the Jews. 

This season take time to celebrate Jesus.   The gifts, decorations, and the hustle and bustle are something we enjoy and possibly endure, but Jesus is the reason for the season.

 

Discovery Trail

This morning I continued my annual Thanksgiving tradition of running a 5K.  It wasn’t an official race, but I ran it anyway.   No cheering crowds or official timers, just me and the pounding of my feet on the trail.  There is a wonderful trail here in Clinton called the Discovery Trail.  It’s a running/biking trail along the Mississippi River.

 

The trail is dedicated to three astronauts from the Clinton area; Cmdr. Dale A. Gardner (U.S. Navy), Dr. George D. (Pinky) Nelson and Col. David C. Hilmers (U.S. Marine Corps).  I only ran 3.1 miles of the trail, but it stretches 14 miles along the riverfront. 

Often, we take for granted things that others have sacrificed greatly for.   As I was running, I thought about those who sacrifice for our freedom.  I was thinking about those astronauts who worked so hard to achieve their goal of becoming an astronaut.  They sacrificed and served our country in ways we may never now.  Likewise, many in my family have served in the military.  Whether in the US Army or the US Navy, my family has been well represented in this fashion.  They have made sacrifices that we may never know of as well.   

One of the lighthouses along the Discovery Trail

While running, I passed by other runners and walkers enjoying the trail.  It was quite chilly but everyone I passed had a wonderful smile on their face.   While running, I decided to research these three astronauts.  

George Nelson flew on Challenger, Columbia, and Discovery.  He received several medals from NASA for his work as an astronaut. 

Dale Gardner flew on the Challenger and Discovery.  He completed two space walks for a total of 12 hours.  His work helped salvage two satellites.  He received recognition from the Department of Defense and several commendations from NASA.

David Hilmers has logged over 493 hours of space flight on Atlantis and Discovery.  He was part of a classified mission and during other missions he completed at least 66 experiments while in space. 

These men dedicated their lives to something bigger than themselves.  Yes, they received commendations, awards, and had the experience of being in space, which very few people have done.  But they still dedicated themselves to serve a higher purpose.   

I’ve learned a couple of things.  One, when you commit yourself to something, go after it with all you have.  These guys reached the height of their careers because they made the effort to do so.  We can each accomplish great things when we set our minds to do so.  

Two, take the time to learn about your surroundings.  I have been aware of this trail for some time and have even ran it a couple of times before.  But I never took the time to research these astronauts.  There may be people from your hometown that have done great things that will inspire you.     

I'm Thankful!

This year, my family and I have come home for Thanksgiving.  Home for me is Iowa.  I’m looking forward to spending time with my extended Otto family and with my Mom’s family as well.  We’ve spent a few days here in Iowa resting and relaxing, just being with my folks.  I’ve spent the last several services at church preaching on thanksgiving.  This last Sunday, I preached on what I am thankful for.  I’m thankful for a lot of things: for my family, for my home, for my church, for my salvation and for the Word of God. 

This morning I was reading in my devotion time out of the Psalms.  Specifically, I was reading the 136^th Psalm.  This psalm is completely about being thankful to the Lord.  Verse after verse tells us what we need to be thankful for—His mercy, His works, His goodness.  We ought to be so very thankful. 

It seems that our society has drifted from the intent of the original Thanksgiving meal.  The Pilgrims were thankful for the basics—survival.  They were thankful for just being alive.  They were also thankful for another basic item—liberty.  We’ve moved away from that and spend a lot of time being thankful for material possessions, for wealth and, well, stuff. 

I find it interesting that in America, the self-storage industry is over $38 billion dollars a year.  There are 2.3 billion square feet of storage space available nationwide.  That’s a lot of stuff.  Apparently, it’s a lot of stuff that people don’t need because they are storing it. 

Here’s irony:  we’ll spend Thursday being thankful for stuff.  And then starting Friday, the largest shopping season of the year will kick off with a vengeance and we’ll begin the hunt for more stuff.  I’m not against gift giving or shopping. 

I’m against being thankful only one day a year.  We should be thankful every day.  We should express our thanks for what the Lord has done for us every day.  Take time to be thankful.  Perhaps if we were more thankful every day, we wouldn’t see so much discontentment with what we do have.  Do we really need that 65-inch 4K TV that’s on sale for Black Friday?  It is bigger than the 55-inch TV that we have now.  Maybe I should go look at that sales paper again. . . . 

The Gift

It’s been about two months since my chemo treatment.  I have gotten most of my strength back.  I’m running three or four times a week and lifting weights three times a week.  (Most weeks, though there have been a couple of mornings that I decided to go back to bed instead of going to the gym) 

I saw my oncologist the last part of September.  My tumor marker had dropped to a level lower than before chemo, which is what we were hoping for.  The doctor was very happy to report that, and I was very happy to hear it!  If my number stays below a 3, she says that there isn’t any reason to worry.  I will have more blood work done in December to check my tumor marker.  If everything goes as planned, my next checkup will be in March. 

 As a Christian and especially as a pastor, I get asked all kinds of interesting questions.  One of the recent ones goes something like this: “Why did God allow you to have cancer and why did God allow it to come back?” 

This can be a difficult question to answer.   Let me say this:  being a Christian does not exempt me from hard times and difficult circumstances.  As I like to say, God did not promise us rainbows and lollipops.  In fact, the Bible tells us just the opposite—we can expect suffering and hard times.  We are told to endure hardness as a good soldier. 

So, why do I think that the Lord allowed my cancer?  I do believe He allowed it.  It wasn’t an accident or an oversite.  It was part of the Lord’s plan for my life.  But why?  Simply, so I could minister to others more effectively. 

I have been given a gift.  Yes, through my cancer, I have been given the gift of empathy.  Other pastors can sympathize with members of their congregation going through cancer, but I can empathize with them.  There’s a big difference.  Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone.  Empathy is sharing that experience so that you know what they are feeling and going through.  When I tell a person just diagnosed with cancer that I know how they are feeling at that moment, I mean it.  I was in that position.  I heard those words come out of my doctor’s mouth.  The wonderful thing is, they know that I mean it.  It gives a great opportunity to minister to their needs. 

Some people think that cancer is a curse or a punishment.  I’m not one of those people.  I’m looking at it as a gift.  Is it a gift that was on my wish list?  Not really.  But I do believe I am a better person for it.  The lessons learned thought my cancer journey have served me well thus far and I expect them to continue doing so in the future. 

It’s been an interesting summer, to say the least.  Such a whirlwind!  

At the end of May, I had a checkup with my oncologist that wasn’t what I was expecting.  Since my treatment in 2015, everything had been coming up roses.  All tests were clean, no issues, no worries.  But that changed in May.  A blood test came back with an elevated tumor marker. 

What came next was a series of tests.  A CT scan with contrast showed no tumors, clumps, groupings or other signs of cancer.  With that knowledge in mind, I took a planned trip to Argentina with my missionary brother-in-law.  We had a great trip!  I learned so much about the mission field of Argentina and the work being done.  I taught in a Bible College, preached in three different churches, and was able to talk and counsel with several young preachers.  It was a blessing.  We got back home and next it was off to Junior Camp for a week.  What a week it was.  Our junior age young people had a great week at camp.  The Lord really spoke to our young people and to me as well.  Camp isn’t just for children, you know.

We spent the next week trying to get ourselves back in order.  I had another blood test and the tumor marker came back still elevated.  After talking with my wonderful doctor, praying quite a bit, and listing the pros and cons with Laura, we decided on a regimen of chemo to be proactive.  I have been diagnosed with a chemical recurrence.  This basically means that though the cancer has not physically returned (i.e. a tumor), it is in my blood stream looking for a place to set up camp.  The prayer is that the chemo will kill the cancer before it gets a chance to do so.  My goal is to kill it before it gets strong.   

But before chemo, another week at camp, this time with the Teens.  My soul needed this week.  God moved in a mighty way throughout the entire camp.  We saw teenagers get their hearts right with the Lord; we saw teenagers give their hearts to Jesus.  There were many decisions made that week.  The Holy Spirit comforted my soul in a way that I cannot describe.  I’ve often said that in Christianity, there are things that cannot be explained, but must be experienced to be understood.  This is one of those things.  The Bible calls it the peace that passes all understanding. 

We came back from camp and had a day and a half to prepare for a week in the hospital taking chemo.   Monday morning, Laura and I headed to the Medical Center of Bowling Green.  I have been asked what chemo is like.  It’s hard to explain, but I will try.  Day one, a PICC line was inserted in my right arm.  That’s basically a semi-permanent IV line.  The chemo nurses assigned to my care started me with premeds.  This is medicines to prepare my body for the chemotherapy drugs.   Then came the chemo.  After the chemo came bags of fluids to flush my kidneys.  

Every cancer has its own regimen of chemo drugs.  I could tell you the various drugs that were used, but it wouldn’t make a difference, so I’ll save you the techno-speak.  If I remember correctly, there were three or four different types used that week.  The first one took 24 hours.  I felt normal on Monday.  Tuesday came another round and I started getting tired by Tuesday evening.  Wednesday brought a third round and by about 8:00 that evening the chemo effects were in full swing.  My sister tells me it was like a switch was thrown.  I stopped talking, I stopped wanting to do anything.

I really cannot remember Thursday, Friday, or Saturday.  The nausea started.  The inability to eat or drink and keep it down.   The extreme fatigue.  That’s about all I can remember.  One thing I can remember is the flood of visits, calls, texts, messages, and cards.  Friends were reaching out to offer help and support.  I'll never forget that.    

Sometime late Saturday/early Sunday we were discharged.  I don’t remember leaving the hospital or the drive home.  I do remember being in my own bed.  The next three days were rough.  I vomited about 40 times in three days.  Couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, couldn’t drink anything.  My doctor ordered me back to the hospital for care.  After a day or two of fluids, meds, and my wife and sister forcing me to eat and drink, I was on the mend. 

I’m home now.  Been here several days resting and recovering.  I make a terrible patient.  There’s so much I need to do and want to do, but just don’t have the energy or strength to do. 

We don’t know what’s next.  I have another blood test on Friday.  I’m praying my tumor marker will be at a 0.  I see the oncologist on Monday to get these results.  We’re trusting in the Lord for His Grace and Mercy. 

So yeah, it’s been an interesting summer, to say the least.  My last blog entry was about making lemonade out of lemons.  I love irony—it’s my favorite form of humor.  I’m trying to make some lemonade over here.  I promise.