I'm Thankful!

This year, my family and I have come home for Thanksgiving.  Home for me is Iowa.  I’m looking forward to spending time with my extended Otto family and with my Mom’s family as well.  We’ve spent a few days here in Iowa resting and relaxing, just being with my folks.  I’ve spent the last several services at church preaching on thanksgiving.  This last Sunday, I preached on what I am thankful for.  I’m thankful for a lot of things: for my family, for my home, for my church, for my salvation and for the Word of God. 

This morning I was reading in my devotion time out of the Psalms.  Specifically, I was reading the 136^th Psalm.  This psalm is completely about being thankful to the Lord.  Verse after verse tells us what we need to be thankful for—His mercy, His works, His goodness.  We ought to be so very thankful. 

It seems that our society has drifted from the intent of the original Thanksgiving meal.  The Pilgrims were thankful for the basics—survival.  They were thankful for just being alive.  They were also thankful for another basic item—liberty.  We’ve moved away from that and spend a lot of time being thankful for material possessions, for wealth and, well, stuff. 

I find it interesting that in America, the self-storage industry is over $38 billion dollars a year.  There are 2.3 billion square feet of storage space available nationwide.  That’s a lot of stuff.  Apparently, it’s a lot of stuff that people don’t need because they are storing it. 

Here’s irony:  we’ll spend Thursday being thankful for stuff.  And then starting Friday, the largest shopping season of the year will kick off with a vengeance and we’ll begin the hunt for more stuff.  I’m not against gift giving or shopping. 

I’m against being thankful only one day a year.  We should be thankful every day.  We should express our thanks for what the Lord has done for us every day.  Take time to be thankful.  Perhaps if we were more thankful every day, we wouldn’t see so much discontentment with what we do have.  Do we really need that 65-inch 4K TV that’s on sale for Black Friday?  It is bigger than the 55-inch TV that we have now.  Maybe I should go look at that sales paper again. . . . 

The Gift

It’s been about two months since my chemo treatment.  I have gotten most of my strength back.  I’m running three or four times a week and lifting weights three times a week.  (Most weeks, though there have been a couple of mornings that I decided to go back to bed instead of going to the gym) 

I saw my oncologist the last part of September.  My tumor marker had dropped to a level lower than before chemo, which is what we were hoping for.  The doctor was very happy to report that, and I was very happy to hear it!  If my number stays below a 3, she says that there isn’t any reason to worry.  I will have more blood work done in December to check my tumor marker.  If everything goes as planned, my next checkup will be in March. 

 As a Christian and especially as a pastor, I get asked all kinds of interesting questions.  One of the recent ones goes something like this: “Why did God allow you to have cancer and why did God allow it to come back?” 

This can be a difficult question to answer.   Let me say this:  being a Christian does not exempt me from hard times and difficult circumstances.  As I like to say, God did not promise us rainbows and lollipops.  In fact, the Bible tells us just the opposite—we can expect suffering and hard times.  We are told to endure hardness as a good soldier. 

So, why do I think that the Lord allowed my cancer?  I do believe He allowed it.  It wasn’t an accident or an oversite.  It was part of the Lord’s plan for my life.  But why?  Simply, so I could minister to others more effectively. 

I have been given a gift.  Yes, through my cancer, I have been given the gift of empathy.  Other pastors can sympathize with members of their congregation going through cancer, but I can empathize with them.  There’s a big difference.  Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone.  Empathy is sharing that experience so that you know what they are feeling and going through.  When I tell a person just diagnosed with cancer that I know how they are feeling at that moment, I mean it.  I was in that position.  I heard those words come out of my doctor’s mouth.  The wonderful thing is, they know that I mean it.  It gives a great opportunity to minister to their needs. 

Some people think that cancer is a curse or a punishment.  I’m not one of those people.  I’m looking at it as a gift.  Is it a gift that was on my wish list?  Not really.  But I do believe I am a better person for it.  The lessons learned thought my cancer journey have served me well thus far and I expect them to continue doing so in the future. 

It’s been an interesting summer, to say the least.  Such a whirlwind!  

At the end of May, I had a checkup with my oncologist that wasn’t what I was expecting.  Since my treatment in 2015, everything had been coming up roses.  All tests were clean, no issues, no worries.  But that changed in May.  A blood test came back with an elevated tumor marker. 

What came next was a series of tests.  A CT scan with contrast showed no tumors, clumps, groupings or other signs of cancer.  With that knowledge in mind, I took a planned trip to Argentina with my missionary brother-in-law.  We had a great trip!  I learned so much about the mission field of Argentina and the work being done.  I taught in a Bible College, preached in three different churches, and was able to talk and counsel with several young preachers.  It was a blessing.  We got back home and next it was off to Junior Camp for a week.  What a week it was.  Our junior age young people had a great week at camp.  The Lord really spoke to our young people and to me as well.  Camp isn’t just for children, you know.

We spent the next week trying to get ourselves back in order.  I had another blood test and the tumor marker came back still elevated.  After talking with my wonderful doctor, praying quite a bit, and listing the pros and cons with Laura, we decided on a regimen of chemo to be proactive.  I have been diagnosed with a chemical recurrence.  This basically means that though the cancer has not physically returned (i.e. a tumor), it is in my blood stream looking for a place to set up camp.  The prayer is that the chemo will kill the cancer before it gets a chance to do so.  My goal is to kill it before it gets strong.   

But before chemo, another week at camp, this time with the Teens.  My soul needed this week.  God moved in a mighty way throughout the entire camp.  We saw teenagers get their hearts right with the Lord; we saw teenagers give their hearts to Jesus.  There were many decisions made that week.  The Holy Spirit comforted my soul in a way that I cannot describe.  I’ve often said that in Christianity, there are things that cannot be explained, but must be experienced to be understood.  This is one of those things.  The Bible calls it the peace that passes all understanding. 

We came back from camp and had a day and a half to prepare for a week in the hospital taking chemo.   Monday morning, Laura and I headed to the Medical Center of Bowling Green.  I have been asked what chemo is like.  It’s hard to explain, but I will try.  Day one, a PICC line was inserted in my right arm.  That’s basically a semi-permanent IV line.  The chemo nurses assigned to my care started me with premeds.  This is medicines to prepare my body for the chemotherapy drugs.   Then came the chemo.  After the chemo came bags of fluids to flush my kidneys.  

Every cancer has its own regimen of chemo drugs.  I could tell you the various drugs that were used, but it wouldn’t make a difference, so I’ll save you the techno-speak.  If I remember correctly, there were three or four different types used that week.  The first one took 24 hours.  I felt normal on Monday.  Tuesday came another round and I started getting tired by Tuesday evening.  Wednesday brought a third round and by about 8:00 that evening the chemo effects were in full swing.  My sister tells me it was like a switch was thrown.  I stopped talking, I stopped wanting to do anything.

I really cannot remember Thursday, Friday, or Saturday.  The nausea started.  The inability to eat or drink and keep it down.   The extreme fatigue.  That’s about all I can remember.  One thing I can remember is the flood of visits, calls, texts, messages, and cards.  Friends were reaching out to offer help and support.  I'll never forget that.    

Sometime late Saturday/early Sunday we were discharged.  I don’t remember leaving the hospital or the drive home.  I do remember being in my own bed.  The next three days were rough.  I vomited about 40 times in three days.  Couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, couldn’t drink anything.  My doctor ordered me back to the hospital for care.  After a day or two of fluids, meds, and my wife and sister forcing me to eat and drink, I was on the mend. 

I’m home now.  Been here several days resting and recovering.  I make a terrible patient.  There’s so much I need to do and want to do, but just don’t have the energy or strength to do. 

We don’t know what’s next.  I have another blood test on Friday.  I’m praying my tumor marker will be at a 0.  I see the oncologist on Monday to get these results.  We’re trusting in the Lord for His Grace and Mercy. 

So yeah, it’s been an interesting summer, to say the least.  My last blog entry was about making lemonade out of lemons.  I love irony—it’s my favorite form of humor.  I’m trying to make some lemonade over here.  I promise. 

Lemons and Lemonade

We've all heard the old sayings, when life hands you lemons, make lemonade.  It sounds good.  It sounds like something that we should all be able to do.  Here's the issue.  No one ever says "when life hands you lemons, make lemonade and here's how."  Long on advice, short on instructions.  I'd like to give you a quick set of instructions on how to make said lemonade.

Step #1.  Cut up the lemons.  That's right.  You've got to cut them up into slices.  There's a couple of reasons to do so. You can't get the juice out without slicing those lemons.  How does this help us in a literal sense?  Take your problem and cut it up into manageable pieces.  As a man, one of my biggest issues is trying to tackle the whole problem at once.  That never ends well.  Tackle small portions at a time.  This will give you those all important small victories when you resolve the small portion of the problem and give you the encouragement to move on to the next slice of the problem.

Step #2.  Add water.  Pure lemon juice is pretty stout.  It needs to be diluted with water.  When life hands you lemons, you better water them down.  What do I mean by this?  Dilute the lemons.  Take your problems and cares to the Lord in prayer.  Like the old gospel hymn says "have a little talk with Jesus."  Find a good friend or a loved one to talk to.  The worst thing you can do is hold all those lemons in.

Step #3.  Add sugar.  Yep.  Find you some sugar and sweeten those lemons right up.  My Mom always would say that every cloud has a silver lining, you just have to look for it.  When you realize that life has handed you a big bucket of lemons, look for the silver lining.  It may be hard to find, but it's there.  Let me give you an example.

On a recent road trip, the transmission went out on our vehicle.  We were 45 minutes away from our destination and 2 hours away from home.  I told my boys that we were blessed that it happened exactly when and where it did.  We broke down right by an off ramp, so we were able to get off of the parkway safely.  We were on a flat stretch of the road.  If we had been a few minutes further down the road, we would have been in some pretty serious hills and if the transmission had went out on those hills, there's no telling what would have happened.  See, a silver lining.

Step #4.  Stir.  Stir it all up.  Add all these things and mix well--get your problems into bite sized portions, add water and sugar.  Pretty soon, your lemons will indeed be lemonade.

I'm at a point in my life, where I really don't like it when life gets turned upside down.  But it happens.  I've learned that it's best to just relax and start turning those lemons into lemonade.  The best part of making lemonade?  Sitting on a shady porch, relaxing, and sipping a cold glass.  It makes the struggles well worth it.

What's Your Weakness?

What’s Your Weakness?

Everybody has one.  Some people are aware of their weakness and others aren’t.  Some are aware of it but chose not to do anything about it.  I had a trainer tell me one time that those exercises you hate the most are the ones you need the most because they reveal your weaknesses.  I thought about that and realize he was right.  The lifts that I complained (and still complain about) are the ones I need the most.  

As my church family knows, Little Debbie Snack Cakes are a weakness of mine.  I cannot just eat one oatmeal cream pie.  I just can’t.  My sweet wife will buy a box and before I know it, I’m gorging myself on one after the other.  I know that if I eat one, it will quickly become 8.  So, to keep that from happening, we don’t buy them anymore. 

Let’s talk about spiritual weaknesses.  The tempter, Satan, knows your weak points.  For some it may be laziness, others, alcohol, and for some porn.  Satan knows exactly how to attack you.  The Bible refers to these attacks as fiery darts.  It seems that these little darts always strike right at the weakest point of our defenses. 

I haven’t ever really had a desire to drink alcohol.  That’s never been a weakness of mine, so I am not often tempted to pick up a six pack of beer.  I’m not tempted to gamble.  Sure, occasionally, I daydream about what it would be like to win the lottery, but I’m not tempted to buy a ticket. 

But I have my weakness.  I know where I’m likely to stumble and fall.  I know what I must be on guard for spiritually.  I’m sorry to say that even though I know my weaknesses, I still from time to time fall into the tempters trap. 

Identify your weakness.  This requires you being honest with yourself and with the Lord.  Identify them and then establish a plan to defend yourself against them—just like the Little Debbie snack cakes.  I don’t bring them into my home, so I can’t gorge myself on them. 

Once you have identified your weakness develop a plan, and stick to the plan.  No exceptions! Exceptions only lead to excuses.  

Remember Mark 14:38 “Watch ye and pray, lest ye enter into temptation. The spirit truly is ready, but the flesh is weak.”  Watch and pray.  Watch means to be on guard.  Be on guard and pray for help in resisting temptation!    

Friends

A couple of weeks ago, I got a text message from one of my oldest friends.  His ministry has taken him in a different direction—he’s in missions, so we don’t get the chance to hang out very often.  He asked a simple question; do you want to grab coffee on Monday the 19^th.  I immediately said yes.  What surprised me was how much I looked forward to this meeting since that text.

We met at 7:00 in the morning, early, yes.  We spent an hour talking about our ministries, our families, just catching up.  I was reminded how much I enjoyed his company.  I was reminded how much I missed just chatting with him.  We fellowshipped over coffee and much too quickly, our time came to an end. 

Something we all need is a friend.  In the world of social media where people talk about having 567 “friends,” we often overlook the need for human interaction.  One thing that this generation is losing or perhaps has already lost is the ability to look someone in the eye and connect on a personal level.  There is something about us as humans that crave this friendship. 

The Bible speaks about friendships.  In Proverbs, the book of Wisdom, we find that if a man wants to have friends, he must show himself friendly.  In short:  be the kind of friend you want to have.  Are you a good friend?  Are you there to lend support?  Are you there when needed?  Are you friendly?

Proverbs also tells us that as iron sharpeneth iron, a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.  

Sometimes, friends tell us exactly what we need to hear in exactly the way we need to hear it.  They tell it like it is.  My wife has a friend that she always goes to for clothing advice.  She’ll try on an outfit and ask me if looks okay.  I’ll tell her yes, it does.  Her response?  She messages her friend for advice.  Laura knows that no matter what, this friend will be brutally honest.  We need this!  We need someone who will tells that, no, we shouldn’t wear that outfit because we aren’t 17 any longer.  (Not that my wife would ever do that, she totally rocks every outfit she wears) 

Perhaps one of the saddest stories in the Bible is about a man named Amnon.  I won’t go into all the details of his story, but in II Samuel, we find this phrase: “But Amnon had a friend.”  Oh my.  Friends are important.  This friend gave Amnon some bad advice.  This advice caused Amnon to take action that would eventually lead to a civil war in Israel.  All because of a friend. 

Be careful with your friends!  Make sure you make good choices about who you allow to be your friend.  Friends may let us down, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be the friend they need.  Remember what Jesus said to Judas Iscariot in the garden that night.  “Friend, wherefore are thou come” (Matthew 26:50).  Judas wasn’t being a friend to Jesus, but that didn’t stop Jesus from being Judas’ friend. 

This Thanksgiving be thankful for your friends.  But don’t just be thankful for them, tell them that you are thankful for them.  Don’t save those flowers for their funeral, give them their flowers today.  Don’t just wish your 567, oops, 568, Facebook friends a happy Thanksgiving, but call a friend and tell them that you are thankful for them. 

Be the friend that you need.     

A Little Early Morning Poetry

Occasionally, I will try my hand at poetry.  Here's something I wrote this morning.  My prayer is it would be a blessing to you.
 

As I was stretching before my early morning run,

I noticed lightning flashing across the sky. 

Softy, I prayed, “Dear Lord, hold back the rain.”

Off I went, down the street and around the corner,

Talking to my Lord, sharing the burdens of my heart,

While my feet steadily pounded the pavement.

One mile down, peace settled in my heart;

Our talk continued as I begin to pray for this town.

Up Cedar Street, past the Justice Center-may justice be done.

Past City Hall, praying for the city government,

May they be wise in their decisions as they lead.

Past the funeral homes, bless those poor families. 

Back the way I came, praying on the other side of the road

Lord bless these houses and the people that make them home.

Turning the last corner onto my street, I come to a stop.

Stretching, water, breathing.  I consider the run I just had. 

A good pace, a good time, so proud of myself.

Then I hear that still, small voice: “what about ME?”

How often we forget to thank the Lord for answered prayer! 

Thank you, Lord, for holding back the rain!  Thank you, Lord for safety!

Forgive me, Lord, for not thanking You like I should. 

Tom Otto

10/2/18