Splitting Hairs

My wife and I recently started watching a long running sitcom together in the evenings.  One of the main characters is a unique individual, with equally unique character traits.  In one episode, several of the other characters began to argue.  The main character left the room, went into the kitchen, and turned on a blender full of ice.  When one of those characters that were arguing asked what he was doing, the other character say that he was attempting to drown out the sound of the arguments. 

In the last several weeks, I’ve really wanted to do something similar.  I have heard of people—good, solid, Christian folks who were arguing with other people about some silly things.  Let me give you a couple of examples. 

Example one, two churches were arguing over who was serving the Lord’s Supper correctly.  Really?  You’re going to argue over that?  Sure, I have my beliefs on the Lord’s Supper, and that’s what we practice at my church.  May I just say, with all due respect, that I don’t care if your church serves communion with saltine crackers or gluten-free, pita bread hand torn into pieces.  I don’t care if your church practices closed, open, or some in between style of communion.  I don’t care if you use Welch’s Grape Juice or the store brand. 

Example two, two brothers were arguing over which Bible college was better.  Obviously, they went to two different schools.  Each was loyal to their Alma matter.  These two brothers weren’t just having a lively discussion on the merits of the two schools but were having a heated argument about why one school was right and the other was wrong. 

Example three, there was a group arguing about what group of churches was right and which ones were wrong. This arguing quickly devolved into name calling and a couple of broken friendships.

Example four, a dear friend and missionary asked me if it would be okay if he wore a bow tie to church.  He was told at a previous church that he was in that he could not wear a bow tie at that church, so he wanted to make sure it was okay at this church.  Really?  Is that a doctrinal issue now? 

WHIRRRRRRRRR!  I wish I could start the blender in all these instances.  May I take a few minutes to explain why I don’t care how your church serves communion, or what Bible College you prefer, or what camp you are a part of?  Pay attention, I don’t want you to miss this.  Ready?  Here we go:  it’s not any of my business.  I’m not a member of your church, so I don’t get a say.  I’m not going to go to either of those Bible colleges, nor send my children there, based on your testimonies.  I don’t care which camp you side with, I try to get along with everyone. 

If more Christians today practiced this philosophy, can you imagine what would be done for the cause of the Christ?  How many more souls could be reached?  How many more ministries could be helping people in the name of Jesus? 

We’ve (myself included) have gotten pretty snooty when it comes to our practice of Christianity.  We get very comfortable critiquing other folks, when it really isn’t any of our business to begin with.  If we were more careful to mind our own p’s and q’s, we’d be far better off.  The Bible speaks very eloquently about this—the mote and beam?  We are quick to point out our brother’s mote while ignoring the beam in our own eye. 

You may not tie your necktie the way I do.  You may prefer a double Windsor to a half Windsor.  You may wear a bow tie.  You may prefer a belt to suspenders or vice versa.  You may use one curriculum in your Sunday School while I use a different one.  Don’t care, don’t care, don’t care.  As longs as you believe in the Book, the Blood, and the Blessed Hope, we’ll get along quite well.  Who knows, we may just learn some things from each other—if we aren’t too busy looking down our noses at each other. 

Oh, you may be wondering what sitcom my wife and I are watching together.  Well, I’m not telling.  You’ll probably go out of your way to tell me why it isn’t appropriate for a pastor and his wife to watch that show.  May I summarize:  None of your business. 

How Can This Be?

How can it be May already?  Wasn't it just November?  How can it be the end of the school year?  I'm sitting in my office, and the school is too quiet.  Most of my students have finished all of their work and are enjoying the afternoon off.  But the yearbook shows all the things we've done this year. 

It's too quiet.  There are supposed to be sounds of learning and fun happening.  I'm supposed to be hearing students giggling when they aren't supposed to be.  But it's quiet.  In just a two days, we will close school for the summer.  My first year as a principal will come to an end.  As I reflect on this school year, there are things that I would have done differently.  There are things that I believe I handled exactly right and would do it again.

I think of the students that have been a part of my first year.  There were challenging days with some of them, that's for sure.  However, I truly think there were more rewarding days than challenging ones.  I think of those students that were only here for a short period before their family moved away.  I pray that we were a positive influence on them while we had them.  I think of the students that won't be coming back next year.    My heart breaks for those students!  I worry about them moving on.  Have we given them enough?  Are they equipped to enter a different environment and maintain their testimony?  Only time will tell.

I think of my staff.  These dedicated teachers that give of themselves day after day.  Being stressed out, getting frustrated, perhaps even angry, yet, the next day, they are ready to do it again.  Our school secretary balancing the school schedule and my schedule and keeping me where I'm supposed to be and doing what I'm supposed to be doing.

I ponder on chapel this year.  Did the messages help the students?  Was I too hard?  Was I not hard enough?  Did I pray enough?  The answer to the first two, probably; to the third, probably not.

As I sit here, typing this, I find myself looking forward to August already.  The new students that we have enrolled, those yet to be enrolled.  Smiling faces, expectant looks, new shoes and pencils.  It'll be great.

But first, we have a program and a kindergarten graduation to do.  I should go work on my 2 hour and 45 minute sermon--I've got to give these students enough to last them over the summer.  :)

Another School Shooting?

Every time I hear of a shooting at, around, or near a school, my heart leaps in my chest.  My immediate thought goes to my children.  But not just my three boys.  I’m the principal of a small Christian school in Franklin. 

We have twenty students ranging from Kindergarten to 10^th grade.  Every time the news tells me of another shooting, those 20 faces go through my mind.  I find myself walking the halls of our school, peeking into classrooms, counting heads, testing outside doors to make sure that they are still locked.  I worry about these children, as if they were my own flesh and blood. 

When they miss a day because of sickness, I pray for their healing and recovery as it were one of my sons sick in bed.  When they are tardy, and we haven’t heard from their parents, I worry and have my wife reach out to them to make sure that they are okay. 

Do I worry about someone deciding to shoot up our school?  Sure.  Every single day.  So, what do I do?  Most every morning, I stand outside greeting the students as they are dropped off.  I look at their little faces to try to determine who’s having a bad morning.  I try to talk to those students just a little bit more than normal, to let them know that I care. 

Every afternoon, I stand outside and watch their parents come pick them up to make sure that the leave just as safely as they arrived.  Those students that had a rough day?  I normally talk with their parents to let them know—I’m not tattling, I just want the parents to know that I know what their student is going through. 

Do I think that this epidemic of violence against the most innocent portion of the population is entirely to blame on guns?  No.  Do I think it is entirely the fault of violent video games?  No.  Do I think it is entirely to blame of absentee parents?  No.   I think it’s a combination of all of these and more.

You’ve probably heard countless people say this “when I was a kid. . .”  and they normally go on to say how everything was better and it was always rainbows and lollipops when they were kids and there were no problems. 

My generation grew up with violent video games (remember the furor over Mortal Kombat?)  My generation grew up with working parents, we were probably the original latchkey kids.  My generation grew up with guns in the home.  Yet, we didn’t see these senseless acts of violence that we see all to frequently today.  Our problems were different.  Someone from my generation can most likely tell of someone in their class or the class behind them or ahead of them that committed suicide as a teen.  Someone my age can probably tell you of someone they went to school with who died while driving drunk.  Though the problems are different, the root causes may just be the same.

In our society, there is a definite lack of respect.  A respect for life.  A respect for a difference of opinion.  A respect for each other.  A respect for authority.  A respect for self.  Respect comes from an understanding that each of us has value.  Young, old, black, white, citizen, immigrant, poor, male, or female.  We all have value. 

Nothing in our society will change until we all see the value in each other.  That kid whom no one likes because he’s weird?  He has value.  The poor kid who doesn’t speak the best English?  He has value.  That girl who doesn’t fit in with the cool kids?  She has value.  That guy working two jobs to keep a roof over his children’s head?  He has value.  The mom who relies on government assistance to feed her children because she can’t work?  She has value. 

We want things to change?  Stricter gun control is just putting a bandaid on the situation.  So is arming teachers.  So is putting police officers in schools.  We need to treat the root cause of the problem to solve it.  We need to start teaching our children that everyone has value.  Everyone is worthy of our respect.  Not only do we need to teach this to our children, we need to live it in front of them.  Actions speak louder than words.   We need to start valuing the people around us, when we do so, they will start to see the value in themselves.  Then things may start to change for the better. 

Lessons from Running

 

Finishing my 3rd Half-Marathon

 

I’m training for a half-marathon.  If you do not know, a half-marathon is 13.1 miles.  I’ve ran 7 half-marathons before.  This will be the third post-cancer.  I’m excited about it.  Training for a half is probably what you think it is—a lot of running, three times a week you may see me out and about running around our town. 

You don’t start your training by running 13 miles at once.  Even though I have experience running half-marathons, I still start my training at the beginning.  Two miles one day, two and half the next time, and then a 5K on Saturday, building up to a 12-mile run just before the race.  This last weekend, I was scheduled to run 7 miles.  I typically get up early on Saturdays and run my long run.  However, this Saturday I was busy, so I could not run.  My fallback plan is early Sunday morning before church, however it was raining at a pretty good rate, so I did not feel safe running in those conditions (safety first, nothing ruins a training plan like a twisted ankle or getting hit by a car). 

Plan C was Sunday afternoon between services.  We came home from church, and fixed lunch.  After about an hour, I pulled on my running clothes (layers in winter, always layer) and laced up my shoes.  Remember, I’m typically a morning runner so this was out of my comfort zone. 

I had an amazing run.  Those 7 miles felt great.  That may be a foreign concept to you, but they really did.  The first couple of miles went by quickly.  I was breezing up hills and rolling right down them.  It was over before I realized 7 miles had past. 

This morning, I was slated to run 4 miles.  I got up early and set out on a familiar route.  I struggled.  The first mile was sluggish.  The second mile my legs were like “nah, I don’t think so.”  My breathing was ragged, and my heart rate was up higher than normal for a run.  Mile 3 was terrible and mile 4 was almost impossible.  But I finished the route. 

Immediately, I begin to think about the differences in the two runs.  My 7-mile run was much better than my 4-mile run.  You would think the opposite was true.  I begin to compare the differences.

•  In the 7-miler, my hydration was on point.  I sipped some water every 2-miles.  It was spot on.  This morning?  I didn’t even carry water with me. 
•  In the 7-miler, my nutrition was spot on.  A healthy lunch gave me the fuel I needed for the run.  This morning?  I didn’t eat anything before I left on the run.  It’s called breakfast for a reason (breaking your fast). 
•  In the 7-miler, my legs had been primed for a run.  I stretched before my run Sunday afternoon.  This morning, not so much.  A few toe touches and I was out of the driveway. 

You’d think that after training, running, and finishing 7 half-marathons, I would have theses simple keys to a successful run down pat.  But no, I made some simple mistakes that cost me later.  We can apply these same lessons to our spiritual walk with the Lord. 

Are you hydrated?  The scriptures tell us to be full of the Holy Ghost.  The scriptures also warn us about quenching the Spirit.  Do we allow the Holy Spirit to work in us and through us or are we dried up, wore out Christians?  As I run, my body consumes water and I need to replenish it, if I don’t, my body begins to fatigue easier.  The scriptures remind us not to be weary in well doing. 

Is your nutrition, right?  Not only does my body consume water, but it consumes nutrients as well.  I was well fed before my 7-mile run—not a heavy meal, but a nutritious meal, half way through the 7-miler, I chewed some energy chews to resupply my body.  Spiritually, we need the Word of God to feed our souls.  We need good healthy meals and we need refills during the week.  This is the importance of our daily devotional life.  If you’re depending on your pastor to feed you during services, you’re going to starve the rest of the week. 

Are you primed to walk with the Lord?  Before starting any exercise regime (whether it be running or what not), you need to stretch.  Begin each day with a prayer time.  It doesn’t have to be long, it just needs to be effective.  Talking with the Lord will prime you to serve Him that day. 

Thursday, I’ll be running again.  This time my schedule will be for 5 miles.  You can rest assured that I will take advantage of the lessons I learned (again) this morning. 

It's what time?

As usual for a Sunday evening, last night I laid down at 10:00 PM or so for a good night's rest.  As usual, it took me about 3 minutes to fall asleep.  Then the unusual happened.  At 1:30 AM (really late or really early, depending on your perspective), I was wide awake.  It took me a minute to figure out what time it was and that the alarm clock had not gone off. 

I lay in bed for a few moments and then all of a sudden, BAM!  No, Emeril was not in my bedroom.  I was attacked by doubts and fears and worries.  Just out of the blue, all these little voices in my head started screaming for my attention.  After tossing and turning for a while, I finally got out of bed and knelt down in the living room and began to pray. 

About 2:00 I got off my knees and went back to bed.  I was feeling quite drowsy at this time.  As I lay there waiting for slumber to overtake me, those pesky voices came right back.  Wouldn't you know it?  Worried about financial matters, worried about the upcoming tax return, worried about my wife (she's been sick for a while now, wonder what's wrong), worries, worries, worries.  After a few minutes of this mess, I got back up and went back to my spot in front of the couch.

Guess I wasn't done praying.

I prayed a while longer.  I had a sincere heart-to-heart with the Lord  I prayed for a long time.  I wept a bit.  I confessed a few things.  I gave some things over to the Lord.  At that point, I was wide awake.  I decided to go grab two things:  my Bible and my flashlight.  After getting them from my desk, I returned to the living room and sat on the couch. 

 I read a portion of scripture from Romans.  I read a portion of scripture from Genesis.  My soul still wasn't quite satisfied, so I followed some advice from a long time ago--I turned to the Psalms.  I read Psalm 27 for some reason.  Maybe because a bookmark was close by or maybe the Holy Spirit led me to this passage.  Verse 14 says this "Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD."  

As I pondered those words, I felt peace enter my heart and soul.  Those little voices?  They had gotten very quiet for some reason.  At this time, the clock showed 3:00 AM.  My alarm goes off at 4:00 so I can head to the gym.  At peace, I whispered another prayer, asking for an hour of sleep.  I went to my bed, I laid down, and I drifted off to sleep.  At 3:59 and some change, I awoke feeling so very refreshed.  Honestly, it felt as if I had slept the whole night without interruption. 

I'm going to preach this text Wednesday night, if the Lord will allow, so I won't go into too much detail here.  But take this with you:  trust the Lord and He will strengthen your heart.  When you're weak, rely on God's strength.  When your tired, rely on God's stamina.  When you hear the little voices in your head telling you everything's wrong, rely on God's Word to tell you why everything's going to be okay. 

Preaching on the Home

As much as I love the holiday season, I am thankful that the holidays have passed for another year.  Here we are in January!  Winter has finally decided to arrive in south central Kentucky and we have been enjoying freezing temperatures for several weeks now.  In typical Kentucky fashion, the weatherman is predicting that Wednesday's temperatures (January 10th) will be in the 60's!

Our church calendar is still very active, the next item on our agenda is our annual Purity Banquet.  This is a time we set aside each year for our young people to make a commitment to the Lord.  This commitment is that they would keep themselves pure until marriage.  It is always a special time at our church.

I believe that it is with this banquet in mind that the Lord has led me to begin preaching on the home and on prayer.  For the foreseeable future, I will be preaching on these two topics, one on Sunday morning and the other on Sunday night.

Last Sunday evening, I begin the series on the home.  We began with the foundation.  The psalmist tells us in Psalms 127:1 "Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it."  We spent our time examining the foundation of our homes.  We saw that in I Corinthians that there is no other foundation that can be laid except the Lord Jesus.  The home should be based on the Lord!

We finished the sermon by looking at eight warning signs of foundation failure.  I believe that this series of messages will be a help to those who are having family trouble as well as those who are interested in keeping trouble at bay.  I'm excited to see what the Lord will do with this series on the family.

On Sunday morning, we began our series on prayer.  If there is one thing that every Christian could absolutely work on, it's our prayer life.  It is so important that we know how to pray!  I'm probably the least qualified preacher to preach on prayer, but the Lord has led me to do so.  I am looking forward to learning and applying new things to help my prayer life.

Join us!  We would love to see you at any of our services!

The Princess Bride

One of my absolute favorite movies is The Princess Bride.  It has everything-romance, intrigue, action, humor, absolutely everything that a great movie (and an awesome book, by the way,) could need or want.  Since my college days, I could do a rather good impression of the Impressive Clergyman’s wedding ceremony.  You’ve probably heard of it, but not realize where it came from.  

"Mawwiage.  Mawwiage is what bwings us togethew today.  Mawwiage, that bwessed awwangement, that dwean within a dweam.  And wove, twue wove, wiww fowwow you fowevah and evah...so tweasuwe youw wove...Have you the wing?"  

There’s a significant truth in this funny quote.  Right there, almost in the middle— “that blessed arrangement.”  Marriage is indeed, a blessed arrangement.  Marriage began in the Garden of Eden.  God created man and saw that he was alone.  After every single other act of creation, God looked at His handiwork and said, “it is good.”  Not so with Adam.  God saw that something, or rather, someone was missing.  So, God created Eve.  Adam and Eve were joined in holy matrimony, creating the arrangement below. 

Notice a couple of things about this arrangement, if you will.  God is at the top of the triangle.  The husband and wife are at opposite ends of the triangle.  This is a beautiful picture of marriage.  Due to the nature of a triangle, as the Husband and Wife move closer to God, they move closer to each other.  Hopefully, you also see that the Husband and Wife are on the same plane—they are on the same level, equals, if you will. 

As a preacher, I’ve had many opportunities to talk with people about their marriage.  As a pastor, those opportunities have come more frequently.  Each marriage in unique, and the problems that each couple have are unique, but I have noticed some similarities. 

First, communication.  Men can talk to their buddies, to their dogs, to their truck or to the grass, but it seems as if men have a problem talking with perhaps the most important person in their life—their wife.  I’d be the first to admit that I have made this statement more than once: “I’m not a mind reader.”  Do you know what?  Neither is my wife.  If our marriage is to stay in this blessed arrangement, we must learn to really communicate with each other. 

Just a simple reminder:  communication has three parts.  The first is delivering a message.  The second is receiving the message, and the third, understanding the message.  In most marriages that get unbalanced, I see that one party is talking and the other party is not receiving the message.  Many times, we listen to respond, not to understand.  TALK TO EACH OTHER.  You’d be surprised how many misunderstandings, arguments, and spats would be avoided if a husband and wife would simply talk and seek to understand what the other is saying to them. 

Second, and may I be blunt?  Sex.  Sex was given by God to married couples to enjoy together; in fact, in Hebrews, we read that marriage is honorable and the bed is not defiled.  Intimacy is not a weapon to be used or leverage to be applied in a marriage.  When we attempt to use intimacy in this way, we cheapen and devalue it.  When sex is misused in the marriage relationship, the blessed arrangement is distorted—no longer are the husband and wife on the same level.  Intimacy and communication go hand in hand.  After almost 20 years in the ministry, I have seen that when one goes awry the other is sure to follow.  If you cannot talk to each other, how can you ever hope to be intimate with each other?  Oh, and before we move on, true intimacy is more than just physical activities. 

Third, leadership.  When one side of the marriage tries to become a dictator, things go sideways very quickly.  I cringe when during counseling with a couple, I hear the words “You will do this or else.”  Ultimatums should never be thrown down.  They never end well.  Yes, the Bible says that the man is to be the leader of the home, and in fact, the Bible teaches that the man will stand before God and give account for the way he leads his home.  This does not mean that the man is to be a dictator.  If you study the Bible carefully, you will notice something very unusual about successful leaders in the Bible.  They were all servant-leaders.  They led with authority, but they led by serving those around them.

   

Guys, let me talk to you for a minute: we can all quote the verse in Ephesians: “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands.”  Oh, we love that verse and we love to remind our wives of that verse, don’t we?   Take your Bible and look up that verse—Ephesians 5:22. Read it.  Underline it.  Highlight it.  Now, read verse 21.  “Submitting yourselves one to another.”  Yes, the wife should submit to her husband’s leadership.  However, the husband should submit to his wife as well.  In this chapter, husbands are told three times to love their wives.  This love is qualified— “as Christ loved the church, and gave himself for it (verse 25).  Husbands, if you love your wife sacrificially (i.e. putting her needs before your own), you will submit to her and she will submit to your leadership.  I am adamant about this:  if I love my wife properly, she will have no reason not to submit to my leadership, and she will delight in doing so.  My wife treats me like a king, because she knows she is my queen. 

Communication, intimacy, leadership.  These three items work together in such a way to form a blessed arrangement.  What does your triangle look like?